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“NO TIME TO BE A MAN”
Concerning famous
composer, Richard Wagner, Deems Taylor wrote, “What if he
was faithless to his friends and to his wives? He had one
mistress to whom he was faithful to the day of his death:
Music. Not for a single moment did he ever compromise with
what he believed, with what be dreamed. There is not a line
of his music that could have been conceived by a little
mind. Even when he is dull, or downright bad, he is dull in
the grand manner. There is greatness about his worst
mistakes. Listening to his music, one does not forgive him
for what he may or may not have been. It is not a matter of
forgiveness. It is a matter of being dumb with wonder that
his poor brain and body didn't burst under the torment of
the demon of creative energy that lived inside him,
struggling, clawing, scratching to be released; tearing,
shrieking at him to write the music that was in him. The
miracle is that what he did in the little space of seventy
years could have been done at all, even by a great genius.
Is it any wonder that he had no time to be a man
(emphasis mine, bgg)?” Deems Taylor, A Monster, Of Men and
Music Published in Hardcover by AMS Press (June, 1937)
It is a matter of
perspective isn’t it? From a secular viewpoint, we stand in
awe at what men have been able to accomplish in art, music,
literature, science, engineering and the like. It seems odd
that so many men of surpassing intelligence, even genius can
be so thoroughly ignorant, possibly even disdainful of what
it means to be a real man. Yet we see them every day. We
live under their political influence and governance. We read
their literature. We watch their athletic endeavors. Our
lives are made easier by their inventions or our lives are
made a nightmare by their inventions of war. From those who
grace the respected halls of the academy to men in the
gutters of impoverished and drug infested slums, from media
moguls to the man on the corner selling papers, from
multimillion dollar athletes to the foul mouthed, alcohol
smelling bully yelling at his son at the little league game
we see them: Men who ought to be real men but who are
failing miserably at the task. Worst of all, we see them in
too many churches.
We are living in an age
of crises. War, terrorism, energy costs, immigration, and a
host of other issues beg for our attention and for
solutions. I would suggest that one of the greater crises in
our day, in our country, in our town, maybe even in our own
church or family is the “Vacancy” sign hanging where the
godly, dedicated and sacrificial father and head of the home
used to be.
In a Press Release
from the National Fatherhood Initiative and Advertising
Council concerning the “It Takes A Man To Be A Dad” campaign
we read, “In 1960, less than 8 million children were living
in families where the father was absent. Today the number of
children living in fatherless homes exceeds 24 million,
which translates into one out of three children in America.
Children living in father absent homes are more likely to be
suspended from school, drop out, be treated for an emotional
or behavioral problem, commit suicide as adolescents and
experience child abuse or neglect.”
We shake our heads and
click our teeth at those who father children and abandon
both them and their mother. We wish the law would do
something to hold them accountable. Could it be though,
fathers, that we may be guilty of similar dereliction of
duty in our own homes? When is the last time you seriously
and prayerfully considered just how you are doing as a
husband and father? When you look in the mirror do you see a
man who loves his wife and children more than himself? Do
you see a man who will sacrifice time, money and even career
for his family? Do you see a man too busy for the assemblies
of God’s people, too busy for prayer and Bible study at
home, too busy for quiet meals with the family, too busy to
take an active role in the lives, training, discipline,
education and conversion of his children? If so, you may be
looking at someone who has “no time to be a man.”
Beloved brethren, read
the following anew and vow to obey from the heart the will
of the Lord for a man who is a Christian, a husband and a
father:
“Husbands, love your
wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for
her…” Eph. 5:25 ESV
“Likewise, husbands,
live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor
to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with
you1 of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be
hindered.” I Pet. 3:7 ESV
“Fathers, do not
provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the
discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Eph. 6:4 ESV
Brother Jim Ward tells the story of an Austin lawyer (I
believe) who gave his son an airplane (full size) on his 21st
birthday. With tears in his eyes the son rejected the gift
saying that he would rather have had a father who would have
just played ball with him when he was growing up. The busy
and successful man didn’t have time. Fathers, when it comes
to rearing your children, if you don’t do it right the first
time, when will you have time to do it over? Think about it.
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